Thoughts...

So I know that I have been extremely crappy at keeping up with my blog. Cory is in school again and it makes him really busy and therefore, he hogs the computer a lot, ha ha. I need to try to do shorter blogs more often rather than longer blogs very rarely. And I need to get better about my pictures because I am kinda slacking. I do have some thoughts going on in my head and brace yourselves, its not all positive...

• Today is officially 1 month since the first of the year and although my goal of losing weight is on my mind every second of the day, it has not been as successful as I wanted it to be. I have lost 9 pounds total and its a struggle every day. I think that the moral of my story at this time is the the working out side has.to.happen. I have *in my opinion* done all that I can from simply eating right (based on what happened last year and the tough wall that I have hit this year just even starting losing weight. So I need to figure it out. No more excuses, just figure it out.
• Some people on my team at work are also losing weight and we are doing a team weight loss challenge. Winner gets free lunch *ironic* and I want to win. 1 pound lost in 2 weeks isn't going to get me there.
• Tomorrow is my late grandmother's birthday. She would be 70. I miss her like crazy every day. I really miss her now with Sydney growing so much every day. She was pretty dang awesome.
• Does anyone else ever feel like they are an outcast in their own family? I have really been feeling like this lately and it bugs me. Annoys me. Infuriates me even. Let's just say that it bothers me in all senses of the word. Initially when I thought about getting that off of my chest, I had a lot of other thoughts to piggy back on that, but right now I am just at a loss for words. It makes me so thankful that I do have my husband who understands me and gets me fully. So when I start to feel like this he is really great at making me brush it off. But it still is a super bummer.
• I wish I had a career that I felt like I was putting my heart and soul into.
• I also wish that my workplace was a more pleasant atmosphere. I don't want to speak too direct but when Cory and I met we worked in an industry where you always felt like you had to look over your shoulder. When I graduated and got my first job, I didn't think that I would be made to feel like that again. Guess I was wrong about that too.
• Sydney is amazing these days. Every week she is talking more than the previous week. Because of her steady and accelerating development, they have started to transition her into the 2 year old room at school (she doesn't turn 2 until June). I am a proud mama! I will always let my child move at her own pace and whatever pace that is I am fine with. But I am a loving and excited mama. And I am just going to end on this happy note :) Happy rest of the week!